Forgive the method, remember the love
Candle smoke on tissue paper
89,5 cm x 64,5 cm
Artist’s Statement
Forget the method, remember the love explores the often unspoken complexity of childhood discipline, particularly within African households. The image of a mother holding a belt and a child with their head lowered is not an endorsement of violence; it is a reflection on how discipline, though painful, was often a language of love passed down through generations.
I come from a background where physical discipline shaped character. It taught us respect, humility, and emotional resilience. Today, as I look back, I realise the emotional weight those moments carried. Privately, we laugh about them sharing stories that have become part of our identity. But publicly, they are condemned, often reduced to acts of harm without context. This work stands in that tension: between memory and judgement, pain and purpose.
I chose to work with candle smoke on tissue paper — fragile, vulnerable materials that mirror the delicacy of those childhood memories. The smoke gently burns into the paper, much like those moments left quiet, lasting marks on us. These are not just marks of pain, but of transformation. This piece is not a justification, but a confrontation. It asks us to look at our past with nuanced eyes to recognise the layered realities of love, discipline, and emotional inheritance. Through this work, I translate personal history into visual language, turning silence into strength and memory into meaning.
Gallery
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